The Caffeinated Advocate

Overdue. Way overdue. Yes, I know. I've seen a quite a few friends and acquaintances whose blogs I follow take somewhat of a hiatus for a few months. I fell into that category, too. However, I'm unapologetically me and I know that I have nothing to say I'm sorry for. I'm far from perfect. I'm not so perfectly imperfect, and I'm grateful for being so. *** As many of you have seen from my social media posts over the last two weeks, I'm in the midst of another professional transition. I've shed tears, I've had many laughs, and my heart is bursting with gratitude for what lies ahead as I honestly and wholeheartedly " achieve my truest self ." More on that another day and another time. That's not the purpose of this blog. I've taken on a lot (a loooooooooooooot) this past month, maybe a little much, but these are callings I have chosen to answer just the same. If you follow or have friended me on Facebook, you'll see that I...

Tomorrow is "the anniversary." Seventeen years have passed. To this day, I still remember each every moment that occurred on April 19, 2001 (and the entire weekend that followed). I remember wearing an orange polo shirt, khakis, brown suede boots and a matching jacket from Wilsons Leather where at the time, I worked as an assistant manager. I was due to report to my Century III store at 5pm that evening after Christian’s appointment with his endocrinologist and grabbing a quick bite to eat before dropping everyone off and heading to my shift. This day by no means played out as it was “supposed to.” At the appointment, I was told that my son “wasn’t normal” and that something was “wrong … very wrong.” The day didn’t go as it was “supposed to.” Or … did it? As promised, for the first time on The Caffeinated Advocate, I am sharing the excerpts from my 2008 speech delivered at a walk kickoff luncheon at Heinz Field in front of over 700 people. *** Ralph Waldo Emerson tells us, ...

Have any of you seen that meme on social media yet? Apparently, it's the term that was created to indicate that you're "too tired to give a shit."  It gave me a good laugh, and it kind of speaks to how I've felt these past several weeks. Ok, so maybe I don't completely not give a shit, but I would say I'm giving less of a shit out of sheer exhaustion. I haven't done much with my book outline, I never picked a logo for a future web home for this blog (and whatever else may come down the pipeline), and I just haven't felt like blogging. Blogging for likes and loves and follows and numbers after ending your post with 70 hashtags isn't healthy, isn't productive, and honestly ... I would challenge that many people DON'T give a shit about posts like that. You blog when you have something to say that is of value to an audience or provides you with some sort of release. Tonight's post I'm pretty sure will serve both purposes, becaus...

I have many friends, acquaintances, colleagues who will agree with people whom I've never met or will ever meet, that say "we don't need autism awareness for April, we need action! We need acceptance! Stop the awareness!" Hmph. Mmm-kay. Stop what you're doing. Stop talking. Pull up a chair, grab some coffee (and if you would be so kind, share some with me because I need plenty more after the next dip in our roller coaster), and just ... LISTEN. Oh, and bring me some cream and sugar, because I don't take mine black. Awareness, by definition, is "the state or condition of being aware; having knowledge; consciousness." For hundreds of thousands of people, their awareness of conditions and causes ends with being in a state of consciousness. STOP TELLING ME WE DON'T NEED AWARENESS . Just stop. I will confidently, completely and unapologetically call bullshit. Our world and its communities are NOT fully aware. They do not understand the ful...

I am so grateful to the  Autism Connection of Pennsylvania  for including "Preparing for When the Bus Stops Coming" in their Spring 2018 Newsletter! A full and unedited version of this article, including some personal content that shares a touch more of more of my "why" (along with a powerful photo) and a bit more about the curriculum I promote in my role at Wesley Family Services is being shared this evening on my blog. I am truly blessed to serve in a role  that allows me to continue to contribute to creating and encouraging positive change in our community to transform lives.  There is incredible content throughout the newsletter, including the importance of donating locally and not jumping to national charities (and if you know me well, you know exactly who I am referring to and why) without doing your homework. Don't miss your chance to read about their exciting happenings. The women at Autism Connection of PA never cease to motivate and inspire me. Rea...

It's time. I don't know how I'm going to make it happen, I don't know how I'm going to finish it, but ... it's time. A little over a month ago, I finally launched The Caffeinated Advocate  after saying for many years, "you know, I should run a blog." Years ago, I announced in front of over 700 people at the kickoff luncheon at Heinz Field for what was then known Pittsburgh's "Walk Now for Autism" that I would be writing a book "someday" that shared our story. Thousands across the community know pieces of our story, including the devastating incident that led to Christian receiving his diagnosis of autism. I started writing a few chapters years ago. When I reached my seventh chapter, a few things happened: 1) I froze, because I reached the point where I had to relive April 2001, pouring buckets of salt into old and deep wounds that were very slow to heal. 2) A week later, I lost everything I had spent months writing b...

The following article making its round through social media has me puzzled and quite frankly frustrated "#asf":   https://tonic.vice.com/en_us/article/7x7myx/prom-for-disabled-people-perpetuates-stigma?utm_source=tonicfbus Nope, nope, and nope. It's a nope from me, folks. 👎👎 I've been commenting left and right on this article, so ... what do you know, it inspired a post. Funny how that happens, eh? (Or not.) Forcing an individual and/or family to choose any sort of placement, provider or environment is not and has never been acceptable to me. Quite frankly, I find it ironic when advocates push for one means or the other and justify such by saying "it is in their best interests." But, is it always? No. It doesn't work that way. We don't know everyone's story. We shouldn't make up other people's minds before they have the opportunity to decide what is the best fit. It is unacceptable to limit choice. When you limit choice, you in tur...